Partisan Pick-Up Lines

Well, Summer I is over. I would be out celebrating right now but instead I'm home and sick and pouting.

So, you all will probably hear from me a lot this weekend, since I won't be going anywhere unless I randomly recover very quickly.

So here are some pick-up lines you can use next time you are at a partisan party, convention, or fundraiser.

Democrats/Liberals:

• "Can I smoke your cigar?"
• "Want to come back to my place and not have sexual relations with each other?"
• "My heart almost stopped bleeding when you walked into the room."
• "I voted for Obama."
• "Want to see my new anti-war/Bush/Palin/Cheney T-shirt?"

Republicans/Conservatives:

• "I've had a vasectomy."
• "You remind me of a pitbull....with lipstick."
• "I voted for McCain."
• "I voted for Bush. Twice."
• "Want to introduce your Dick to my Bush?" (I'm sorry. I couldn't resist...)
• "Condoms are overrated."
• "Want to go to Argentina this weekend? I get the Sanford discount on travel expenses."
• *Taps foot against foot of person in the adjoining toilet stall*

These are guaranteed* to work at your next Partisan Event.

*Guarantee expires on July 9, 2009